New Years and Pineapples

a beach full of people

a sky full of stars

a horizon full of fireworks

the ocean stretching for miles at my feet

That's how 2020 started for me. It was a beautiful moment. In Bahia, Brazil, it's tradition to welcome the new year letting the waves wash over your feet. It's also tradition to wear all white, but no one told me about that till I got to the beach, so I was one of the few people not wearing any white clothes... Oh well. 

But let me backtrack a bit. The last days of 2019 were spent preparing the Cabana de Capoeira for the Roda that would be held there on New Years day. That involved a lot of raking in my part, as well as planting some bromeliads. The cabana is basically a concrete floor with a palm fiber roof and benches around the sides, perfect for capoeira. My hands are now accustomed to raking, and it isn't a painful activity anymore. However, when I had to use the machete to clear out some grass, I quickly developed a blister on my right index finger. All steps towards having functional hands for the kind of work I'm doing here...

Cabana de Capoeira

On New Year's Day, many people dressed in white came to the Fazenda OuroVerde, and we had a big Roda (that's where 8 or 9 people play musical instruments, 2 people play capoeira in the middle, and everyone else sits around the circle and sings). The Roda started around 11:30 and went until 5:00. I was exhausted by the end. 5 hours of loud music and paying attention without a lunch break really wears me out. I did decide to wear earplugs almost the entire time, which was a good move on my part, because it makes the music pleasantly muted and bearable for an extended amount of time. I am extraordinarily sound-sensitive, which can make things like this very unpleasant or even painful if I have to spend an extended amount of time in a noisy environment.

I played the first game of the Roda, and when I went to play later, Mestra Tisza pulled me to the side of the circle and told me "your pants are dirty". I was very confused. They were off-white, yes, but so what? "You have your period", she said. I had started my period without noticing and had bled through onto my white pants. Embarrassed, I left the Roda to wash my white pants and put on grey ones. 

Capoeira in the Roda

Capoeira game between Mestre Cabello and Angolinha

Since then, I have continued my work in the morning and class in the evenings. I am learning more about the farm work here. There are many plants that produce edible fruits growing here, but upon first glance it doesn't really look like it. One of the primary things the farm produces is pineapple. There are a couple small pineapple fields and many pineapple plants strewn in among various fruiting trees and coconut palms, which means that the pineapples ripen at different times and harvesting is done more on a "See a ripe one and pick it" basis. The pineapples here are the most delicious I have ever tasted: sweet as can be and barely acidic. When you pick one that has been sitting in the sun all morning, it smells like a cake fresh out of the oven. 

Dora and I with freshly picked pineapples.

This morning, my task was to collect the tops of pineapples and the shoots that appear near where the fruit is. Next week, we will plant these spiky seedlings and create a new generation of pineapples. 

Yesterday my task was to spread fertilizer at the base of various trees, including cacao and lime trees. This fertilizer came in the form of plants growing in amongst the trees that I cut down with the machete and chopped up at the base of the trees. These plant pieces will break down and create an environment full of bacteria and fungi at the base of the trees, thereby naturally fertilizing them and contributing to their well-being. 

All of this busy-work gives me much time to think. A current philosophical realization of mine is that I don't like the response to someone thanking you in Spanish and Portuguese. In English, when someone thanks you, you say "you're welcome". In Spanish and Portuguese, you say "de nada", which means "of nothing", or "it was nothing". However, often what someone is thanking me for was, in fact, quite a bit of work. And I did the work, didn't I? That must mean it's worth something? I don't like the fact that the appropriate response is to negate the fact that my work has any worth. I have resolved to try to answer thank yous with "ta bom", which translates approximately to "it's good", thereby refraining from devaluing my work. 

I'm still lonely here. Some days are very difficult. Sometimes things are frustrating, such as when I catch a ride with Cabello to the Barracão and he doesn't tell me that he won't be returning home until 2:00 in the morning until after everyone else has left and the last bus has gone (I took a taxi back). I feel very out of place sometimes, and too young. I'm too young to be a female here trying to fend for myself by myself in a country where I'm unfamiliar with the customs and communication is difficult (though not impossible). The longer I spend here and the more I learn, the more I realize that I know very little. But I continue to learn. I'm working on understanding my position here, how to avoid getting sick and getting enough sleep, and how to move around in a world where I feel like a puzzle piece from the wrong puzzle. I'm learning how to manage my sound sensitivity. I'm learning when to say yes, and when to say no. Trying to put myself out there more, even though I feel shy and talking to people can be very intimidating, especially when talking in Portuguese. And also knowing when to say enough is enough and I really just need to go somewhere quiet. 

I'm really looking forward to more people getting here for the big capoeira event that starts on the 15th, because that means I won't be quite as alone. Around 30 people will be living here during that time period, including 3 people I know from Flagstaff. I just have to make it to next week, but hopefully people will already start arriving. I think things will start to get better now.